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Thursday, February 3, 2011

My Secret Public Journal, Entry #012: Walk Away

So, at the suggestion of a friend/classmate I decided to make these journal-esk writings that don't sum up into a central theme laced with ambiguity and a cheesy song playing in the background. Instead I'll just free-write about whatever strikes me...complete with a little lacing of ambiguity...and a cheesy song playing in the background. I call it My Secret Public Journal.

Love & Waffles,

ps: don't sue me Mike Birbiglia

"Walk Away" by The Script (Feat. B.o.B)

What the hell are we doing? Tip-toeing around this issue? Staying at bay in this cold war of "impossible" love? You said never, yet you stay. I don't get it, lyrics, blog posts, maybe I'm looking too much into it. Maybe I'm being overly hopeful, but I think a part of you won't let go either.

If this isn't what you want then you should leave. "We'll never be truly happy," you said. You know the routine, I'm too hard-headed and stubborn to admit defeat and walk away. I'll fight till I'm dead as long as I feel that there is still a chance. And you still standing there is as much of a sign of hope that I need.

I'm too weak to let you go. I've tried, but I just can't. Are you in the same place as I am? I know why I can't let go, but if you can't either then why is that? Why shouldn't we give it another try? If you can then what the hell are you doing? Friends is not something we can be right now, nor is it something that we may ever be able to be again.

I know it's hypocritical, but I can't do it, but if I can't be your fantasy then I think you should leave. Walk away. Don't give me any false hope. Stay only if you want this to work. Otherwise you'll have to be the stronger person. Let me go. Let us go. Otherwise I will keep on fighting.

Am I stupid to think that you and I feel exactly the same? Why can't we just talk this over? Why can't we find a middle ground? Or if worse comes to worst, why can't we just walk away?

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